BODILY
A
cowboy had been caught by some Indians and was about to be executed
when they asked him for any last request. So he walked over to
his horse and whispered something in its ear. The horse took off
madly over the hills and then came right back with a beautiful
naked blonde on its back.
The
cowboy took the blonde to a teepee and had sex. Then he came back
out and requested another talk with his horse. The Indians, amazed,
agreed again. So the cowboy walked over to the horse and whispered
in his ear again.
The
horse took off and then came back with a beatiful naked redhead.
He takes her into another teepee and has sex with her. He comes
out and once more asked to talk to his horse.
The
Indians once more agreed. So he walked over to the horse and whispered
something else into its ear. The horse took off and then came
right back with a beautiful naked brunette on its back. The cowboy
took the brunette to a teepee and had sex.
Then
he came back out and requested another talk with his horse. The
Indians, totally amazed by this point, agreed again. So the cowboy
walks over to the horse and says, "I'm only going to do this
once more, now read my lips, 'pose'"!
A
man walks into a drug store and calls the pharmacist over and
asks him if he has any pills that can keep him hard all night
since he had three girls coming over for the night.
The
pharmacist gave the man a jar of pills and told him to take two
every three hours and he would stay hard all night. The man went
home and took the whole box of 30 pills together.
The
next day the man returned to the drug store and called the pharmacist
over again. The man showed the pharmacist his penis which was
black and blue and covered with a rash. The man asked the pharmacist
for some rub A5-35, but the pharmacist told the man he was crazy
to put rub A5-35 on his penis.
The
man replied that it wasn't for his penis, but his shoulder, since
the girls did not show up.
This
useful tool is commonly found in the range of 8 inches long, the
functioning of which is enjoyed by members of both sexes. It is
usually found hung, dangling loosely, ready for instant action.
It boasts of a clump of little hairy things at one end and a small
hole at the other.
In
use, it is inserted, almost always willingly, sometimes slowly,
sometimes quickly, into a warm, fleshy, moist opening where it
is thrust in and drawn out again and again many times in succession,
often quickly and accompanied by squirming bodily movements.
Anyone
found listening in will most surely recognize the rhythmic, pulsing
sound, resulting from the well lubricated movements. When finally
withdrawn, it leaves behind a juicy, frothy, sticky white substance,
some of which will need cleaning from the outer surfaces of the
opening and some of from its long glistening shaft.
After
everything is done and the flowing and cleansing liquids have
ceased emmanating, it is returned to its freely hanging state
of rest, ready for yet another bit of action, hopefully reaching
its bristling climax twice or three times a day, but often much
less. Ah yes, such are the characteristics of one's toothbrush!
A
huge muscular man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender
hands him the beer and says, "You know, I'm not gay but I
want to compliment you on your physique, it really is phenomenal!
I have a question though, why is your head so small?"
The
big guy nods slowly. He's obviously fielded this question many
times. "One day," he begins, "I was hunting when
I got lost in the woods. I heard someone crying for help and finally
realized that it was coming from a frog sitting next to a stream.
So
I picked up the frog and it said, "Kiss me. Kiss me and I
will turn into a genie and grant you 3 wishes." So I looked
around to make sure I was alone and gave the frog a kiss. POOF!
The frog turned into a beautiful, voluptuous, naked woman.
She
said, "You now have 3 wishes." I looked down at my scrawny
115 pound body and said, "I want a body like Arnold Schwarzenneger."
She nodded, whispered a spell, and POOF! there I was, so huge
that I ripped out of my clothes and was standing there naked!
She
then asked, "What will be your second wish?" I looked
hungrily at her beautiful body and replied, "I want to make
sensuous love with you here by this stream." She nodded,
laid down, and beckoned to me. "We then made love for hours!"
Later,
as we lay there next to each other, sweating from our glorious
lovemaking, she whispered into my ear, "You know, you do
have one more wish. What will it be?" I looked at her and
replied, "How about a little head?"
Why
do bald men have holes in their pockets?
So they can run their hands through hair!
If you wish
to submit any good BODILY JOKES, please email me at:
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